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It was a different world there: Size wasn’t so much of an issue, though there was a hierarchy, with the skinnier girls at the top.

I had a few boyfriends every summer, and when I got really thin, I suddenly had a boyfriend back at school, too. After that it was back to the old way, and I didn’t have a boyfriend anymore. I was always overweight, but when I got to Vassar I was diagnosed with polycystic ovarian syndrome.

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In light of yesterday’s controversial piece by Maura Kelly, I’m posting a story by Jennifer Abramowitz (as told to me), an amazing plus-size woman who recently spoke openly to me about her experience dating in New York City.

This piece was bought by a national women’s magazine, then killed, and I think now is the time to post it. I’m also a publicist, an extrovert, a bargain-shopper extraordinaire and an unbelievably good friend.

*** I was on a date recently and a woman sat down at the next table, catty-corner to me. But what’s most visible about me, what defines me before I even open my mouth, is my size.

I was embarrassed and annoyed, already contemplating how I was going to get out at the end. I’ve dieted my whole life and can’t remember a time when I wasn’t concerned about my weight.

I grew up with a mother who told me I was amazing, who said I could accomplish whatever I wanted to. But when I was a teenager, she also started saying, “You need to lose weight.

It will be harder when you get older to find your partner.” I went to weight-loss camp when I was young and was introduced to boys and the bases.

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545 Comments

  1. So you are over 40 and single, due to the death of a partner, divorce, or just by choice.

  2. After a while it led to an argument, not really an argument, but it was me exploding because I had been drinking and I said, – No matter how much you try, you’ll never understand why they have to wash their hair everyday or put baby powder in it at times. And you’re never, not ever, going to understand their logic.

  3. The following are characters who first appeared in the BBC soap opera East Enders during 2012 listed by order of first appearance. The first character to be introduced was the undertaker, Les Coker.

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